Sassy Sisterhood Blog

Dancing in the Rain

claudia@wordflirt.com (Claudia Loens) — Fri, 10 Sep 2021 16:06:27 GMT

When was the last time you danced in the rain…or have you ever? Twice in the last two weeks, I threw my arms up open wide and twirled in the rain. Both were beautifully warm summer showers and it felt amazing!

What I noticed about myself when I did this, was that all-consuming feeling of gratitude, the power of the universe and…surrender. Yes, surrender. I took long deep breaths as I held my face to the rain and let it take me. Wow – was it cool!

Having spent the last six months getting my coaching certifications, I had the opportunity (and took it!) to do some personal development. Several themes came to the surface about how I’ve been living my life for the past 5 years or so.

First, I realized that I have been in a state of “holding my breath” most of the time. Of course I breathe and often breathe deeply. I’m talking about a sort of “holding pattern” with my emotions. The past five years have had many challenges, and many blessings too. I don’t know if menopause has anything to do with it, but I have kept my emotions on a rather even keel. Or at least I thought I had. The truth is, I was numbing myself and holding all of my fears, worries and anxiety in the pit of my stomach. Eww!

Second, I realized that I’m really good at being “busy”! Being an entrepreneur of two businesses, raising 4 daughters and maintaining a household kept me busy. It occurred to me during my development that I don’t have to be this way – geez, what a concept! LOL. While I love what I’ve been doing, I have begun to craft my time the way I want it to be spent. I am finally understanding what balance is…or at least I’m getting there!

Finally, I realized that I have been playing life at a three-star level, and girlfriend , I am a FIVE-star lady! So what does that mean? Well, let’s start with panties. Have you ever worn your panties to the point where there are holes in them and the elastic is so worn that they droop down to your crotch when you walk? Yep. That was me (oversharing! LOL). And guess what? All of those panties have now been replaced by silky, luxurious panties that feel GREAT! I didn’t even bother to donate the old ones – into the trash they went.

Living my five star life only started with panties. I am constantly looking around for ways in which I’m living at the three level. A pan, for instance. Yesterday I tried to clean a pan that was crusted with burnt popcorn. It was an old pan – at least 15 years old – and it was stuck on but good! So, I stopped myself. I marched that pan right out the side door and dumped it in the garbage. Ahhhhh. It felt so good!

In what ways are you living life below five stars?

One thing has come from this and that is, dancing in the rain (or in the kitchen or at my desk, or in the car…you get the idea) is going to be happening on a daily. Why? Because it makes me happy. And, after all, don’t we all just want to be happy?

How to Write Your Future into Existence

claudia@wordflirt.com (Claudia Loens) — Tue, 27 Jul 2021 22:18:58 GMT

One of my favorite manifestation tools is writing a detailed description of my vision. I’ve used this technique to attract major changes into my life (my husband, our dream home) and minor changes (new wardrobe, new job, a car). Perhaps it’s because I’m a writer with a deep passion for words and all their meaning, but this is a very easy way for me to design my life. Want to design and attract something in your life? Here are the steps you can use to write your future into existence:

Steps to Writing Your Future

Clarify Your Objective: Think about what you want to attract into your life in the future – you can put a date on it or just leave it open. The important thing is to know what you want your life to look like in this particular area. The sky’s the limit – relationships, money, career, business, car, health, spirit, - you name it!

The reason clarity is so important, is because when you’re confused about what you want, the universe doesn’t know what to deliver to you. Become crystal clear about what you want and write it in a sentence or two.

Here are some examples:

"I want to attract my soulmate and have kids together."

"I want to earn at least XX per month doing work that I love."

"I want a brand new, high end model white Tesla."

Visualize it as if it already exists in your life. Now that you know what you want, close your eyes and picture it. Imagine wrapping your hands around the steering wheel of your new car or holding your baby or looking at your bank account online. Get a feel for how it looks from a visual standpoint.

Write your new life story. Now you get to fully jump in and be in your vision. Here are some clarifying questions to ask yourself:

What does it look like?

What do I look like?

What am I wearing?

What do I smell?

Who and what are around me?

How do I feel?

What is the atmosphere around me?

Write it out. Once you answer these questions, write your life as if it is that very moment. Here is an example:

“My family and I are now living in our dream house in X city! Every day we enjoy waking up to singing birds in a peaceful environment. Our four bedrooms are perfect for us, and for our daughter plus, a guest room and an office. The master bedroom is large, with a lot of light. It has great energy and flow and I always get a great night sleep in our bed.

I love to cook delicious meals in our gourmet kitchen with a 5-burner gas stove and double oven. I have more than enough storage space and get excited every time I walk into our stocked pantry! The smell of bacon greets my family on weekend mornings and we have long, lingering breakfasts out on the patio next to the pool and waterfall. In the afternoons, Eddie lights up the grill in our outdoor kitchen and makes all the neighbors envious of the amazing aroma of grilled steaks.

The walls ring with our laughter when we play board games or watch a funny movie. Our daughter enjoys her video games in the large bonus room upstairs. I feel at peace in our home. I can be relaxed and do the things I love to do. You can feel the love in our home whenever you walk in and others comment on the good feelings too.

I’m so happy and thankful now that we live in our dream house! Thank you, Universe, for this and all the blessings you provide!”

This is very similar to the manifestation story I wrote before we found our home. In fact, the home had EVERY detail I outlined, except for solar energy. With price we paid, we were able to install the solar ourselves, so in the end, it was everything I wanted.

Rinse and Repeat...OFTEN! Getting into the visualization and feeling state of your dream frequently is important. The more you live in that space, the faster and more accurately you'll attract what you want.

Don’t discount the power of this exercise. Not only is it very detailed, but when you get into the feeling of this future life, you’ll get excited! If something comes up that has you doubting yourself or your worthiness, practice some releasing exercises (more on that in another post!).

Every great athlete and successful business person has utilized a technique like this to visualize their outcome. Not everyone enjoys the process of writing it, but if you can first define it, then you can simply close your eyes and imagine all the detail in your mind’s eye.

Enjoy the process – it should be FUN!

How I attracted my Ideal Partner Through Law of Attraction

claudia@wordflirt.com (Claudia Loens) — Tue, 15 Jun 2021 00:30:08 GMT

After a disappointing first attempt at marriage, followed by a dysfunctional relationship, I went to counseling in my early thirties. I was determined not to repeat the patterns I’d had before.

The one thing that I knew without a doubt, was that I NEEDED to be a mother. Being an auntie to all my nieces and nephew and all of my girlfriends’ kids, I knew I wanted my own. I even thought about adopting or using medical means to get pregnant. I had a deadline for myself of the age of 40, which was quickly approaching. Still, I had faith.

One of my closest friends, Annie, once said to me “Claudia, when you meet HIM, your WHOLE life is going to change!” I didn’t believe her, but I hoped…

Enter Eddie.

Law of Attraction in Action

But I digress. This article is about how I manifested our relationship through Law of Attraction.

Once I learned about the law of attraction in my twenties, I never had a problem manifesting things…new, better consulting gigs, more money, a house, trips, cars. I would simply put the intention out there, do a little visualization exercise and let it go in faith. I got so good at it, that my friends called me the Manifestation Queen.

BUT – I had yet to manifest my perfect partner. Part of me was concerned that I was blocking myself with some sort of self-sabotage that I was unaware of. I thought I’d cleared all of my worthiness issues during counseling. I didn’t FEEL unworthy or blocked, so I was like “what’s the deal?!”

When I meditated on it – more than once – I got the “knowing” that he just wasn’t ready for me. I decided that I could help things along by becoming clear about what I wanted in my partner. I journaled as if it had already come true, starting with “I am now enjoying a loving, fun, passionate relationship with the man of my dreams”. I then detailed how I pictured our lives together. I detailed the characteristics I wanted to attract. Here is a partial list:

· Smart with a great sense of humor

· Wants to have a family and is a good father

· Cancer sign (very compatible with my Pisces!)

· Open to my woo-woo side and can hold deep conversations

· Loves the beach like I do

· Handsome with dark hair and dark eyes

· Active and loves to travel

· Loyal and reliable

· Kind, compassionate and caring

I’d close my eyes and imagine us together, arm-in-arm, surrounded by children. I would imagine a sense of love between all of us and sometimes, I would even let the emotion bubble up – happiness at such a beautiful future.

My good friend and travel buddy, Caroline used to say that I needed to meet her cousin. She went on to tell me about what a wonderful man he is and how we’d be perfect for each other. I would be intrigued and think it could be possible, but she also told me that he was going through a divorce and that the ex was giving him terrible grief over his daughters and custody and visitations. I told her, more than once, that he wasn’t ready yet. I didn’t want someone who was on the rebound or was a “project”. I’d been through a divorce and there was a lot of emotional healing and that was without the involvement of kids.

In the meantime, I had sold my house in San Jose, moved to Portland for a year to write my novel, and returned to the Bay Area to a great consulting gig. After two years of living in a wonderful apartment community, I decided I was ready to buy another house.

My buddy, Gar, helped me move in. He was unpacking my wardrobe boxes and I told him to leave half of the closet empty. He said, “girl, with all these clothes, you NEED both sides of the closet”. But I simply said, “no, I’m leaving room for my future husband” – to which he had a good laugh.

The same thing happened when we pulled into the garage after grabbing lunch. He had a difficult time getting out of the driver’s side because the boxes lined against the wall. He said (a little annoyed because we were both exhausted), “you have the whole garage – why are you squeezing over???”

I said, “sorry, but that side is for my future husband”. He didn’t laugh this time, but rolled his eyes and slammed the car door. I attributed it to low blood sugar.

Later, I was unpacking my toiletries in the bathroom and purposely left one drawer empty. He walked by and said, sarcastically, “let me guess – that drawer is for your future husband?” and I grinned in response.

You see, I read once that you need to make room in your life for your future partner. Think of the example – if you are tightly holding a penny in each hand and someone offers you a dollar, you have to let go of one of the pennies to receive the dollar.

After Gar left, I was beyond exhausted. I was committed to going to Caroline’s 40 ^th birthday party that evening and I could barely move. I sat on the couch with a cup of coffee, hoping to get a fifteenth wind. If I didn’t love my friend, I would have easily bailed on the party. BUT, I knew it was important to her, so I rallied with a plan.

I vowed that I would go to the party, give Caroline her gift, have one drink and then leave before dinner.

When I stood in the entryway of the banquet room, I patiently waited for Caroline to finish greeting her new guests before it was my turn.

And that’s when I felt him. My heart began to flutter and I felt flushed. I was scanning the room looking for “him” – it was a crazy, strong pull that came from deep inside. And then I spotted him – all the way across the room, holding a beer and talking with two men about the same age. Wow! I thought. The energy was insane.

Caroline greeted me with love and escorted me to the side of the room where girlfriends were gathered. The rest of the room was filled with family that I had never met, so I was thankful to see some familiar faces.

Sticking to my plan, I headed toward the bar when Caroline be-lined it toward me with said handsome man in tow. She said, “Claudia, I’d like you to meet my cousin, Eddie”.

We said polite hellos and I told him I was on my way to get a drink. He offered to get it for me and, having difficulty moving my body, I agreed. When he came back, we started a nice conversation. There was something about him – his confidence, the way he was dressed, his kindness – that gave me the impression that he was married. He said “we went on a hike today” and I immediately assumed he meant he and his wife. I felt really disappointed, but I continued to enjoy the conversation thinking it was nice to get to know Caroline’s family.

At one point, I asked, “is your wife here – I haven’t met any other family members yet?” and he said nonchalantly, “I’m not married”.

I immediately stood taller as I said (a little too enthusiastically) “oh really???” Our conversation just got a little more interesting. We talked about my new house and a new job he was starting. We talked about his daughters and other family members. It was completely comfortable – like slipping into old slippers.

We were called to dinner and I knew it was my chance to escape, but, suddenly, I rallied some energy – I wonder where that came from?!

I was seated with all the girlfriends while Eddie was across the room with the other cousins. Occasionally, we’d smile at each other during the EPIC dinner, dessert, toasts, etc. (If you’ve never been to a German gathering you’ll understand!)

When things FINALLY broke up, I was toast. I gathered my purse and said goodbye to the girlfriends. I made my way over to Caroline to hug her goodbye and then over to Eddie. I told him it was nice to meet him and that I enjoyed our conversation.

He said, “so did I – we should do it again sometime” and I merely said, “yes, that would be fun” and left.

When I got to the outer door of the restaurant, I stopped cold. My friends always teased me about missing queues and “not closing the deal” by giving an interested man my business card or phone number. He had given me the perfect opening and I missed the queue to close the deal. But exhaustion won and I figured I would get another chance since he was Caroline’s cousin.

A week went by and I couldn’t get him out of my head. I’d had NEVER felt such energy with anyone before and the deep feeling of knowing was driving me nuts. I didn’t know what to do about it.

That weekend, Caroline and I spent the day together. We went shopping, caught a movie and lunch and later sat at Starbucks over coffee. I finally drummed up the courage and said quietly, “your cousin Eddie is nice…”

She slammed her hand down on the table and said, “I KNEW IT!” (I still tease her about being such a stinker for making me wait all day before we could talk about it!)

She said if he didn’t call her for my phone number, she would plan a BBQ and invite the cousins and friends over.

Another week went by – she and I went to San Francisco to see the musical, Lion King. She said she’d give it a few more days and then decide on a date for the BBQ.

Two days after our outing, I got my hair cut. I mean really cut. I took off 6 inches, leaving it at a bouncy, shoulder length. When my stylist asked me why I wanted to do it, I said that I wanted a new, fresh start and the hair was bogging me down. I felt liberated and sassy with my new haircut.

When I told Caroline I chopped my hair, she said “why??? I loved your hair!!!” and I said “so did I but I’m ready for a new chapter.”

Eddie called me for the first time that night. He said he would love to see my new house and I said, “great – when do you want to get together?”

Queue received. Deal closed.

Summary

If you read my about page , you’ll know that Eddie came with three lovely daughters, ages 4, 5 and 10. It was the family I had asked for. After we were married, we were pleasantly surprised to welcome Abigail to our family.I share this story of manifestation for a number of reasons.

1. Law of Attraction is not always swift and accurate. Sometimes, because of other circumstances unknown to us, things don’t just magically appear – even when using all the techniques we’re taught.

2. When I made “room” for my future husband, not only was it an energetic opening, but it also put me in the VIBRATION of attracting him. Both are equally important when you want to manifest something in your life.

3. Always remember to have and hold faith in your vibration and don’t revert to fear or lack. The basic principles of LOA are “you attract what you put out” so fear and lack will attract more things to fear and lack. Whereas when you come from faith and love, you will attract more things representing faith and love. When you are into faith – go one step further and GET EXCITED! Know it’s coming and be in an exciting, fun place to receive it!

Do you want to attract something into your life? I invite you to sign up for a free 30 minute coaching session with me. We can discuss what you want and your current situation. If I think I can support you, we can take it to the next level. Click below to get started!

Taking the Leap

claudia@wordflirt.com (Claudia Loens) — Fri, 28 May 2021 23:49:31 GMT

I was that kid in elementary, middle and high school to whom other girls came to for support and guidance. I was that young adult who listened to friends and gently offered advice (usually over cocktails or coffee!). I was the business consultant who was a leader and a mentor to peers and newbies.

I became an instant mother of three beautiful daughters. I was their mother in place of one who couldn’t be, and their mentor. And soon a fourth blessing was gifted to me through birth.

I became an entrepreneur, teaching and helping others achieve their marketing goals through my other baby, Wordflirt®. I branched out with my best friend, Karen to start a wellness website so we could teach others about the benefits of CBD through our marketing and our workshops.

A Leap of Faith

I have a lifetime of listening, guiding and supporting women of all ages in one form or another. What I didn’t know, is that all along, I was…well, a coach.

The word “coach” used to make me think of sports, as it does for many. I picture the character Coach Mickey spitting and screaming with a red face, fists pumping, at Rocky as he boxed his way through obstacles to victory. Yep, that’s what I used to think a coach was.

About twelve years ago, I was introduced to the concept of a business coach. For where I was in my work with Wordflirt®, I was hungry for someone to guide me to my goals. I was willing to do all the work but I wanted an experienced entrepreneur to tell me what to do to get there. I was, in essence, the ideal student. I had a mixed experience, but I did learn a lot in the process. And mostly, I got to be a part of the process from the other side.

In the past decade, I’ve worked with a number of women, informally and formally coaching them to improve their lives, build their businesses and learn about the Law of Attraction. It was “hobby” work that I found deeply fulfilling. And the feedback from them was very positive.

I always told myself that “someday” I’ll actually declare myself a coach and I’ll be able to help tons of women achieve their goals, their mindset and their greatness. It was a dream.

Well, today, friends, that dream is here. I’m taking a leap of faith, backed by a lifetime of experience, outstanding training and a big, huge heart full of compassion and love for my fellow sisters.

Am I nervous? Yes. Am I scare? Hell, yes! But I also know from the tip of my head to the soles of my feet that I MUST do it and I must do it now.

So – it is with excitement, trepidation, and joy that I can now officially say…

I AM A COACH!